Wedding Gifts

Question: Our wedding gifts were sent to our old address (and accepted by the new tenants)! how do we get them back?

(Posted by: UW_econ_chic on 2009-12-11 09:06:59)

My husband and I registered at Crate and Barrel last June, and moved in August. We got married in November and are now finding out from several guests that they purchased things from our registry that we never received. I updated the registry with our new address, and requested that they take the old address off of it, however, I now see that the old address wasn& #039;t deleted after all, and not only that, but it& #039;s the first one to show up when guests buy gifts. I assume this is due to the fact that most couples keep separate addresses up until the wedding, but I am sick over it. I am not nearly as worried about the gifts themselve, but the fact that I cannot get the appropriate thank you cards to family and friends. We had a second registry at Macy& #039;s, which many people went through, so I didn& #039;t notice really much of a lack in gifts, and rather in a down economy thought nothing of people not bringing something. I suppose the most frustrating part of this is that the two women who live in our old townhouse have been accepting these gifts, no questions asked...THESE ARE ALL ADDRESSED TO MY HUSBAND AND I!!! Wrong on so many levels, nevertheless, I woke up this morning unable to fall back asleep over the fact that someone could be using our stuff! Wedding gifts nonetheless, and I cannot send personal thank yous without them. PLEASE HELP!!! My husband thinks we should go over there and ask them point blank if they received anything addressed to us, and if they say no to tell them that the police may be by to ask about it. I don& #039;t want to cause a confrontation, although we may need to be direct. Any help from someone who has dealt with this would be much appreciated!!! Thanks.

Posted by: ls on 2009-12-11, 09:23:44

Check first, do the people in your old house have a forwarding address for you? They have the stuff waiting for you to come pick up. If not, ask Crate and Barrel to do something about it, as long as you have evidence that you told them to remove the old address. For the sake of good relations, they may try to help you anyway. Try these things first, THEN the police. Remember, you will need evidence that they took your stuff - were they delivered regular mail, or would they have had to sign for them? Check with the delivery people too (USPS/ UPS whoever), the stuff might be undelivered still.

Posted by: SimpleGirl on 2009-12-11, 09:12:16

Yes you should go over there! I 'm pretty sure it 's illegal to open or tamper with someone else 's mail, and they should have sent it back to the post office or something. Go over there and ask them for your stuff back!

Posted by: Aporia on 2009-12-11, 09:19:49

Well, this really isn 't so much your problem as the problem of people who sent the gifts that you ordered. You might contact the people on your list and let them know that your address is changed, and then they can worry about getting them to you. You could stop over and talk to the new tenant, I 'm sure they don 't want the mixer you ordered from your registry, and as it 's illegal to open mail from other people, they probably haven 't. Also get a change of address form from the post office and use it.

Posted by: ♥Bailey♥ on 2009-12-11, 09:22:25

I 'd definitely contact Crate and Barrel. They have a record of who ordered what from your registry and what was sent. Also, if it was shipped UPS, most likely, they 'll also have records of when it was delivered and those packages may have had to been signed for. Tampering with mail is a FEDERAL offense and I 'd definitely follow up on this. There are so many records kept of the gifts bought for and sent to you, that eventually this will get straightened out. I 'm so sorry that you have to go through this. I know it 's a huge headache. I hope it gets fixed soon. Good luck to you.

Posted by: honest answers on 2009-12-11, 10:06:23

You should definatly confront them. If they do not give the presents back and you have tracking for any of them that confirm they were delivered there, tell them you are filing a police report and it is a federal crime to steal someone 's mail. I 'm not saying to go over and start a fight, but it was pretty low down of them to keep the presents. However, they may have put them back in the mail with return to sender and they are on there way back to the senders. You won 't know until you talk to the residents there.

Posted by: MeAgain on 2009-12-11, 10:50:25

Contact the company about the address not being changed and find out how it was shipped. If it is something that had to signed for get those papers. Go to the people and have the police come with you to "keep the peace " showing up with the police should insure their immediate cooperation. This is not a situation where these people are friends. These are strangers who kept your wedding gifts.

Posted by: Inundated in SF on 2009-12-11, 20:55:53

You probably can 't get (maybe don 't even want) the gifts those two women accepted at your old address but you need to remind them that it is a federal offense (which they could get arrested for) to open things addressed to someone else. Then call a customer service person at Crate & Barrel and explain what has happened. Since you did what you could to change your mailing address as soon as possible but it was C &B 's lack of record keeping (or the website wouldn 't update or whatever), it is their fault and they should send you (to your new address) the gifts that all your people bought for you through C &B. Did you print out paper copies of your change of address attempt? If so, it should have the date on it and you can use it as proof you did do a change of address that their website never took (or if you send a letter, print out a copy, etc.). Even if you don 't have any evidence that you tried to change your address, talk to someone (with some power, not a clerk or switchboard taker). Be adamant but also sound extremely hurt that all those wedding gifts meant for you have never been received because C &B messed up and now you can 't even send out thank yous, nor do you have the privilege of using all the things intended to start your married life off with. A reputation is very important to retailers and if it gets around that the C &B bridal registry doesn 't work correctly, they could lose a lot of business. Don 't get nasty and mad but do sound extremely hurt and sad--it was your wedding and all these people used the C &B registry to get you things you never received (oh poor me...). C &B should be able to look at the registry and figure out what was bought for you, and send you duplicates (if they still have them) of all the things sent to the wrong address.